Tis the season, folks. Spooky Season 2018 is officially underway, and your favorite Nashvillian degenerate writers are back with our guide to the big day. Whether you’re going for slutty or wholesome, expensive or cheap, tasteful or tasteless, we have you covered. It’s our top halloween costumes for 2018! LFG!
Top Halloween Costumes for 2018
Ryan Fitzpatrick dressed as Conor McGregor – Pure sex and dripping with finesse, baby!
Eitri from Avengers: Infinity War – You know that wherever you go on Halloween, you’re probably going to see a million Thors and Thanoses. Be different – be the real scene stealer from Infinity War: Peter Dinklage’s Eitri. Alternatively, you could be “any of the Avengers but covered in dust” according to Herbie Brooks.
Post Vietnam Lt. Dan in wheelchair, and his New Years Eve hooker – This suggestion comes from Cadbury Pringlebatch. A nice idea for the couples out there who are still looking for ideas. Now, there’s something you don’t see every year.
Kanye West with a MAGA hat – Rubber Rooster brought this piece of gold to the guide. You can only do it if you change your phone password to ‘000000’ though.
Gritty – It’s my personal choice for ‘costume of the year’ – sure, there may be some other Grittys out there, but it’s a risk worth taking if you do it right. Gritty is all the rage right now.
PK Subban – Preferably from the bathing suit photo that went viral over the summer:
Dana Holgorsen – If for no other reason than the hair. Just do it. Paste a few rat tails sparingly across your bald head and you’re good to go.
Khabib – “You just run around shirtless fighting people.” –“The General” John Mosley
Mike Vrabel with a Kardashian ass – If you’re going to be the new head coach of the Tennessee Titans, you have to do it right: with an ass and a half.
Then, “Nature Boy” Brandon Vick had a whole host of suggestions that I’m not even going to try and make sense of:
- One eyed pirate cat
- A Nashville Shores manager
- Bill Cosby with smeared pudding on the ass of his jumpsuit
- A thuggish Doug Funnie (Alternatively titled, “Thug Funnie”)
- John Wilkes Puss in Boots
- Mrs. Doubtfire with a Flubber penis hanging down (Maybe with a Patch Adams clown nose too)
- A concussed Dan Marino
Important question to ask: does the Patch Adams clown nose go on Mrs. Doubtfire’s face or the Flubber penis?
Welp – hope we cleared that matter up for you. Happy Halloween.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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