Forgotten Treasures of Americana: The Bermuda Triangle

 In Forgotten Treasures of Americana, Humor

In our never ending quest to provide all of our readers with relatable, ‘slice of life’ style content, we here at the SoBros Network feel the time to weigh in on social commentary has officially come. It’s once again time for me, Big Natural, to open up the leather-bound parchment pages of the annals of history. Put on your plush robe, light your pipe, start a fire, and get ready for deep contemplation. This is the as-often-as-I-remember-to-write-it column: Forgotten Treasures of Americana. Today, we will be looking back upon the fabled Bermuda Triangle.

The Bermuda Triangle is a region of the Atlantic Ocean just off the Florida coast, with Puerto Rico and…you guessed it…Bermuda…making up the other two points of the triangle.

Its history is shrouded in mystery as many a ship has disappeared under circumstances that can’t (or can fully) be explained away by science. That’s led to a tremendous amount of mythology surrounding the area including, but not limited to, alien abduction theories, paranormal activity, and that it could be a wormhole into another dimension. All very viable and valid ideas.

I mean, if you just do a quick Google search, you’ll find TONS of creepy stories and reasonable theories as to what was behind them.

Growing up, I was terrified of the Bermuda Triangle. It’s something I surely thought I was going to have to deal with a lot more than I have as an adult. Which is to say…I thought I would have to deal with it. Turns out, I haven’t had to deal with it at all. You could tell little seven year old Stoney that, and he would be shocked and appalled.

But, in recent years, it seems like the folklore surrounding “the Devil’s triangle” or “Hurricane Alley” has cooled off a bit. I don’t think children are as afraid of the Bermuda Triangle as they should be these days.

In short, I’m asking the question, “what happened to the Bermuda Triangle?”

I mean, sure – there’s been a ton of research that would indicate this phenomenon is just hogwash. There’s the whole thing about ships sailing through the area unscathed all the time. About how cruise ships sail at a leisurely pace to no consequences. Triangle truthers have been criticized for exaggerating stories. People don’t seem to take tropical storms into account. Most of the disappearances weren’t actually mysterious at all.

And, then, there’s the whole issue that the numbers have been grossly skewed and most of the original reports have been proven false. Also, studies have shown that no more ships disappear there than anywhere else in the world.

But, I’m not here for lunacy like that. I go with my gut. My gut said that this place was creepy when I was seven years old, and I have no reason to doubt that. What could possibly change about my perspective in 25 years? It’s a haunted and/or cursed place. Too many people have said it for it not to be true. That’s just basic logic.

It’s time we pay more respect to this legend of years gone by.

I’m officially taking this opportunity to declare that the SoBros Network is setting out on a mission to explore this region for content (not really – it’s kinda scary).

PRIOR FORGOTTEN TREASURES OF AMERICANA FEATURES

3D Doritos
3OH!3
AIM
American Gladiators
Braided Belts
Hasbro WWF Action Figures
Homework
Mama’s Family
Playing Outside
The Super Soaker 50

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley

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