Once a fake trailer that was a part of Grindhouse, Machete is now a full-length movie full of bullets, blades, and blood. It holds nothing back and has no restraint whatsoever. With a cast you would never imagine, this movie lives up to its trailer and leaves nothing but bodies and carnage in its path.
Machete (Danny Trejo) is one of the last few cops in Mexico that is not corrupt. Almost everyone is in the pocket of Torrez (Steven Seagal), a drug lord who has history with Machete. Ignoring orders, Machete goes on a one-man mission to rescue this kidnapped girl, but ends up being just a trap. And right in front of his eyes, Machete’s wife is brutally murdered by Torrez and he was left there to die.
Three years later, Machete is on the side of streets looking for work. When he is approached by Booth (Jeff Fahey) to kill Senator McLaughlin (Robert De Niro) for $125,000, he takes the money to finish the job. Once again, Machete is the fall guy and is blamed for trying to kill the Senator yet never pulled the trigger.
It was a way to get the Senator’s numbers to rise in the polls for re-election. And with the hot topic being immigration, they needed a Mexican to be caught with a gun in his hand. But like they say: “They messed with the wrong Mexican.” He gets help from Luz (Michelle Rodriguez) and Sartana (Jessica Alba), an immigration cop who switches sides to make things right. He also sleeps with them. Lucky guy. The rest of the movie is about revenge and getting it by any means necessary.
Co-directed by Robert Rodriguez and Ethan Maniquis, Machete puts Trejo front and center. Life has not been too kind to Trejo by looking at his face. But it is the perfect look to play Machete and Trejo was meant to be him. He does a lot of slicing and dicing, and is a badass while doing it. Even though Seagal’s Torrez does not have depth or substance, it is cool to see Seagal in a mainstream movie again and playing the villain is even better. But the two actors who really stick out in this movie are Fahey and Don Johnson.
Fahey is the real bad guy in the movie. He captures the essence of a sly and sleazy prick who cares about no one but himself. Fahey out-performs everyone else in this movie. Johnson is Lt. Stillman, leader of an army who lets no one pass in to America. He is gun-crazy and will shoot someone first and ask questions later. Actually, he may not ask any questions at all. Fahey and Johnson play characters that just do not care. There is no room for compassion or sympathy in their hearts and it makes them that much more crazy and a blast to watch.
Machete is an exploitative, trashy B movie and I mean that in a good way. Rodriguez knows how to capture this world of violence. He loves nudity as well and when you can get ladies like Alba, Rodriguez, and even Lindsey Lohan then he feels the need to show them off. And he gave Trejo a chance to headline a movie about a man he was born to be.
So do not worry about the story or the script. This film does push some buttons when it comes to immigration and it could not be more relevant than right now, but it is an extreme version of the issue. Everything in this movie is pushed to the extremity.
This film lets loose and what you saw in the trailer is nothing compared to the movie. It is ridiculous, preposterous, and flat-out nuts. Machete makes mayhem and massacre an art form. A real bloody, disgusting art form.
“Nature Boy” Brandon Vick is the resident film critic of the SoBros Network, and star of Brandon’s Box Office In Your Mouth. Follow him on Twitter @SirBrandonV and be sure to search #VicksFlicks for all of his latest movie reviews.
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