I Am Fascinated by the ‘Robutt’
Welcome to 2019, folks. We are engineering for everything right now. You have a problem? We can come up with a solution. The future is now. And, while a lot of it is practical, some of it is just downright entertaining. Looking at you, Ford. I’m completely mesmerized by this ‘Robutt.’
Ford this week unveiled the Robutt, which is a name I couldn’t have made up if I tried. It’s basically a fake derrière that’s meant to simulate a person who’s hopping into a car after some exercise. The point of the Robutt is to ensure the automaker’s seats can handle a buttload of abuse.
Here’s how it works. The Robutt is basically a soft pad attached to one of Ford’s Kuka robots. Roughly half a gallon of water stands in for human sweat, and the Robutt “sits, bounces and twists” some 7,500 times. It’s meant to emulate 10 years’ worth of seat abuse in just three days. Ford also noted that it shaped the Robutt’s tuchus to resemble that of “a large man.”
I mean….as a large man…I do kind of feel attacked. Like, don’t do me that way – why do you have to assume that the sweatiest ass is the fat man’s ass? Why couldn’t they model this after a petite lady’s ass? DO THOSE NOT SWEAT, FORD?!?!
Okay, I’m sorry. I’ve calmed down.
Listen, if you want to test this thing for REAL buttloads of abuse, you gotta make sure it can withstand a hot pot of chili. Coming home from a workout is one thing, but what happens if you gotta doo-doo and can’t make it home in time?
Huh, Ford? Where’s the testing for that?
I don’t know how this post turned so bitter.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley