Ever read the story about that time a drunk pig went on a veritable warpath through Australia? Well, buckle up your chin strap, folks. We’re going in.
Courtesy of Shoe:Untied by way of the ABC Network:
A booze-pilfering, drunken, feral pig has caused chaos by running amok at an Australian campsite and starting a fight with a cow.
The belligerent porker went on a drunken bender after stealing and drinking three six-packs of beer that had been left out by campers at the DeGrey River campsite in Port Hedland, Australia.
In the series of events that followed the animal went on to ransack rubbish bin bags to find some late-night snacks before starting a fight with an innocent eyewitness cow.
Following the boarish rampage the pig decided to swim out into the middle of a river before collapsing drunk under a tree and falling asleep.
“A booze-pilfering, drunken, feral pig…”
Y’all, we were only five words into this story and it already sounded like one of those late nights out on Broadway. But, let’s go on and see how this stacks up on the Nashville nights scorecard:
- Pre-gaming with at least 18 beers: check
- Eating trash late at night: check
- Fighting a random bystander: check
- Swimming in the Cumberland: check
- Passing out: check
Yep, that’s it, folks. This is the prototypical Nashville night, and I’m so happy that this pig in Australia got to experience it. Probably had a rough week on the farm, not unlike a lot of the folks who venture down to the Music City on the weekend to blow off steam. He might have been looking for a little honey, and when plans fell through, decided to just get trashed.
I mean, we’ve all been there, right?
Everyone who’s anyone in Nashville has had one of these late Broadway nights, you know. It’s just the perfect place to get absolutely wrecked, eat shitty food late, fighting people, and passing out.
That is Nashville and we are all this drunk pig. Live it up.
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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