What does it take to get two of the biggest stars in the world to be in the same movie? Apparently not much. The Tourist brings Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie together in what appears to be a story full of action, romance, and entertainment. In reality, the movie has barely any of that actually in it. It is quite tragic to see Depp and Jolie find a project that they want to be a part of, and then wish they would have kept looking.
Jolie plays Elise, a mystery woman who is in love with a man she hardly ever gets to see. But he gives her letters telling her where to go and stay, and provides the very best for her. And one of his requests is for Elise to find someone with his size and shape to throw off Inspector John Acheson (Paul Bettany) and his team and make them think he is him. The guy she chooses is Frank (Depp), who she meets on a train going to Venice. Frank is a math teacher from Wisconsin who is going on a romantic trip by himself. While Elise takes his breath away, he has no idea what she has planned for him.
This is a change-up for both Depp and Jolie. Depp isn’t wearing make-up and doesn’t have on outlandish costumes. He had to feel naked just portraying a regular American tourist. Jolie is very feminine and dolled-up in this movie. She is not jumping or running around kicking ass. Jolie simply plays a lady in love. But I wish Depp was covered in make-up and Jolie really kicked some ass because The Tourist rarely has any suspenseful or exciting moments in it.
As much as it hurts to say, Depp and Jolie lack any real chemistry whatsoever. They spend quite a bit of time apart and when they do get together, it just doesn’t feel right. As cool as it is to see these two in the same movie, it is the exact opposite when they actually share the same scene.
Director Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck loves Italy and his two main stars. He does a wonderful job showing the beauty of both. But he lets his actors get away with not doing enough. Depp looks scared or confused through most of the movie, and Jolie walks around and seems more interested in herself than in any man she meets. Their characters are lifeless and uninteresting. The story itself is boring. Donnersmarck hopes the audience will be distracted by movie stars and dazzling locations, but it does not work.
Before I saw The Tourist, I wondered what made Depp and Jolie take on this movie. Now after seeing it, I really am left wondering what made them do it. It is less of a romantic thriller and more of a movie with no pulse spending more time stalling and never kicking into gear.
“Nature Boy” Brandon Vick is the resident film critic of the SoBros Network, and star of Brandon’s Box Office In Your Mouth. Follow him on Twitter@SirBrandonV and be sure to search #VicksFlicks for all of his latest movie reviews.
Check out the SoBros Shop. Subscribe to our Patreon. Give us money for no reason. Like us on Facebook. Follow us on Twitter @SoBrosNetwork. Listen on SoundCloud. Watch on YouTube.
