Unicorn Watch: Tooth Bottle Opener

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Welcome back to the Unicorn Watch here on SoBros Network. This is a little feature we run every now and then when we see a man or a woman who seems special. It serves as a reminder to those of you out there who are still hunting your unicorn that these wonderful people exist in the world. Today, we’re taking a look at a woman displaying peak efficiency with her tooth bottle opener.

I can’t believe I’m letting these fabled and esteemed recurring features of SoBros Network dot com slip through the cracks. First, it was Forgotten Treasures of Americana. Now, it’s the Unicorn Watch.

But, fret not, SoBros faithful! I’m back, bringing a wealth of hope to all of you single people out there. No, today’s clip is not loaded with sexual charisma. It does not feature the luscious Paul Chryst. But, what we’re going to talk about today is much more important than lust and musk. We’re going to talk about efficiency.

As usual, here’s a link in case Instagram decides to take this video down.

 

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my dude at the end just found his queen

A post shared by Chicks (@chicks) on

You know why that dude is so awestruck at the end? Because that kind of efficiency is rare.

Do you know how many bottle openers I have just lying around the apartment? Taking up room that could be used for other quality items such as trinkets. The clutter is real – and that’s why it makes this woman’s skill immensely valuable.

I love my trinkets. I would love if I could display my trinkets where my bottle openers currently reside. Do you know how I could achieve that sort of peace? If I didn’t need bottle openers because my wife could effectively use her teeth to open bottles.

What else can that mouth do? I could potentially cut back on can openers. That would save on the light bill, too, if you’re a fan of electric can openers. Wouldn’t need to invest in a pair of high quality wire cutters, so any time I’d have to put up an electric fence, my partner would have me covered. All in all, this is just an incredible skill to have to help you reduce clutter in your house.

Think of all the room for trinkets I could have.

Good luck out there unicorn hunting, folks. We’ll catch up on down the road. Check out the Unicorn Watch archives here.

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley

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