This Restaurant Is Getting Lobsters High Before Eating Them Because It’s More Humane

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We got a weird one today, folks. Apparently there’s a restaurant in Maine getting lobsters high before cooking or boiling them. Why??!?!? MORE AT 6PM!

Just kidding – that wasn’t a news tease. This is an article. You can simply scroll down and read why.

Courtesy of Fox News:

Charlotte Gill, who opened Charlotte’s Legendary Lobster Pound in Southwest Harbor seven years ago, is experimenting with getting the lobsters high off marijuana smoke before killing and cooking them, believing it to be more humane than the traditional methods.

“I feel bad that when lobsters come here there is no exit strategy,” Gill told the Mount Desert Islander. “It’s a unique place and you get to do such unique things but at the expense of this little creature. I’ve really been trying to figure out how to make it better.”

It’s like, “they’re still going to die….but at least they’re going to die happy.”

But, you know what would be more humane? Not eating the fucking lobsters. That’s what I don’t get. You care about being “humane,” but you’re still taking a critter’s life and consuming its dead body for sustenance.

Look – I have no problem with that. I enjoy a good lobster mac and cheese every once in a while. But, I also don’t pretend to be a lobster rights advocate. I make no apologies for devouring other life.

Honestly, it feels a little self-righteous in a way – like, if you care about the lobster’s life, don’t eat it. But, if you eat it, and say, “aw bless your heart, I will make this easier for you” as if you’re some kind of saint, then that’s phony!

Sorry, don’t mean to rail on Charlotte here, but damn – come on. Let’s use some common sense, people.

Following the tests, Gill has dedicated a special outdoor station to sedating the lobsters with THC-infused smoke, but only at the customers’ requests. In the future, she plans to build an even larger tank in order to sedate multiple crustaceans at once.

Oh, so this isn’t even your own moral crusade?!?! This is at the customers’ request??? POMPOUS. YA POMPOUS!

Also, it turns out you cannot get high from eating a high lobster. Could you imagine, though? What a world we could live in.

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley

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