PSA: Always Make Sure Your Candles Aren’t Actually Dynamite

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Especially during the fall, candles are a mainstay of the household. So, it’s important to remember the age old adage about lighting candles: make sure they aren’t dynamite.

Wait, what?

Courtesy of wtnh.com:

A woman is injured after Bridgeport police say she lit dynamite thinking it was a candle.

City officials say a woman is injured after she thought she was lighting a candle, when it was actually a quarter stick of dynamite. As a result, they say her hands received a significant amount of damage and she was taken to the hospital.

Authorities say a second device was found inside the home on Lindley Street in Bridgeport.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. This seems like great advice, right? “Make sure your candles aren’t dynamite before you light them.” That’s a good pro-tip, life hack, best practice…whatever you want to call it! You don’t want to light a stick of dynamite mistakenly and then blow up your entire house and all of your belongings.

But, are we not gonna even ask how or why the hell this lady had dynamite just laying around to begin with?

Like, yeah – she’s incurred some pretty severe damage, and I’m glad she’s okay. But, WHY DO YOU HAVE DYNAMITE LYING AROUND THE HOUSE?!?!? Is that something that the average household keeps at the ready? You just might need some for a nice Saturday morning project, and you don’t want to be out of it!

And, are we not gonna address the fact that most candles don’t actually look like dynamite?

I mean, I’ve never seen the stuff, but I imagine I would be able to tell the difference between that and a nice scented autumnal candle. I can’t fathom that being a mistake I’d make. “Yeah, sure – this thing is just a candle.” BOOM

So many questions, folks, but I’ll tell you – you’ll never have to do worry about this if you buy your candles exclusively from Yankee Candle or Bath & Body Works. Them’s the facts.

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley

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