These Damn Scooters Won’t Go Away

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Remember when we wrote about those dumbass Bird scooters coming to Nashville? Well, now Lime is joining the fray, and about a month ago, Metro Council approved regulations on these little electric scooters.

I can talk until I’m blue in the face about how dumb this is. But, it won’t do any good. That’s how bad the public transit is in Nashville. People are hopping on electric scooters, and weaving in and out of traffic on busy downtown streets and sidewalks. Not to mention, they’re just leaving the fuckin’ things sittin’ around downtown. It’s crazy.

Now, some asshole has been caught on camera carrying a baby around on his dumbass scooter joy ride.

Courtesy of the enemy:

A man is outraged after he snapped a picture of a someone holding a toddler in one arm, while riding an electric scooter. He told News4 he ran after the guy.

We have heard complaints of scooters on sidewalks, and riders dumping the scooter where people walk, but this is another dangerous issue that is not easy to enforce.

Wes Edwards says when he saw it happening at 5th Avenue North and Madison over the weekend in Germantown, he chased the guy down for the safety of the toddler.

This is madness.

I mean, what a scene. Dude comes humming by on a scooter, holding a baby in one arm, dude decides to run him down. What is happening?

I just don’t understand the appeal of these things – much less, I don’t know why I’d ever feel compelled to pick up my child and go scootin’ downtown. This is like something out of a Will Ferrell movie.

Actually, are we sure this wasn’t Ricky Bobby in town filming the sequel to Talladega Nights? Talladega Nights: Pussy Looking Scooters smells like money to me!

If you’re not first, you’re last, I guess.

(Editor’s Note: how did I turn this story into a Ricky Bobby look-back?)

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley

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