At this point, I’m sure I sound like an old curmudgeon. Just sitting here ranting about the good old days. After this post, it’s probably going to seem like I have an axe to grind particularly with Luke Bryan, given I’ve already written a very serious critique of his hit, “Most People Are Good.” But, it’s not so much Bryan or fun in general that I have a problem with. It’s the gratuitous excess that Broadway is becoming.
Broadway is a tourist trap – let’s call it what it is. It’s a collection of overpriced rooftop bars designed to capitalize on Nashville’s reputation as an entertainment mecca and destination city. You don’t sell the steak, you sell the sizzle. Nashville is no different. You don’t sell the culture, the food, and the history. No, you sell the bright lights and the good time.
For the sake of fairness, I should add that our very own Smokey, a Nashville native, has said he recently “lived like a tourist” – rented a hotel room, ate an early dinner, and drank on Broadway. He recommended we all take a night to do that and we’ll fully understand why everyone is trying to get in on the action. Maybe I’ll take him up on that, but for now, I’m going to continue to be the old man yelling at the cloud.
I love that Nashville is a place people want to visit. But, let’s add some substance to it. Let’s add something different. What we don’t need is another country musician coming in and slapping his name on a fancy rooftop. But, that’s just what we’re getting thanks to Bryan.
Courtesy of Eater Nashville (who I am still available to be the Editor for):
Luke’s 32 Bridge Food + Drink, a six-floor monstrosity that will haunt the iconic American National Bank building at Broadway and 3rd Avenue, opens later this month on Lower Broadway. The 30,000-square-foot entertainment facility squeezes in eight bars, two restaurants, and four stages featuring live music.
Touting Nashville’s only rooftop sushi bar, the multi-level space will serve a tight selection of traditional rolls, specialty rolls (a la the Country Girl roll), and a few bowls from poke to hot chicken. The cleverly named Luke Bryan’s Sushi Bar will be headed up by Chef Nick Phrommala. Also crowning the building, you’ll find the Crash My Party Rooftop Patio, which promises to be one of downtown’s largest rooftop bars.
A rooftop sushi bar? In Nashville? Are we sure this is a good idea? Like, nothing actually sounds worse than sitting in the hot July sun and eating sushi.
And, yes – I realize I’m being dramatic – they probably aren’t going to set up shop on the roof exposed to the sun and Summer heat. It’s called cutting jokes, folks. But, I’m sure some people reading this aren’t actually familiar with my work or the greater work of the SoBros Network. So, I feel I should specify.
The menu at Luke’s 32 Bridge Food + Drink draws inspiration from some of Bryan’s favorite foods. Chef Tomasz Wosiak offers starters like hot chicken bites and avocado toast, salads, and a selection of 9 burgers, ranging from veggie patties to an eponymous Luke burger with elk and red dragon cheese.
If he doesn’t have some sort of catfish dinner on the menu, then he’s a marketing idiot. I mean, when I hear ‘Luke Bryan’ I automatically think ‘catfish dinner’ because of that one song. I don’t know – I hate country music. And, since I feel I’ve done nothing but convince everyone reading this that I hate everything and am a bona fide officer of the fun police, I’m just going to bow out now.
To quote the late great Randy Jackson, “yeah issa no from me, dawg.”
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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