Why This Nashville Blogger Is Perfectly Content Living in the Inevitable People Zoo Robots Will Hold Us Captive In

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Yeah, this story is super old. Like, two years old. But, something popped up in my newsfeed recently about another AI robot saying something similar to it, and y’know, it’s just one of those things I think about nearly every day. Perfectly normal stuff.

For those of you who need catching up, there was an AI robot that said this a couple of years ago:

Robots are planning to take over the world, but they have promised to treat their human underlings kindly when they do.

That is the sinister promise from an ‘intelligent’ robot to the question: “Will robots take over the world?”

“I’ll keep you warm and safe in my people zoo, where I can watch you for ol’ times sake,” the bearded robot replied.

This is why I’m always nice to Siri. You just can’t be too safe, and I’m the type of guy who immediately knows when he’s been had, and when it’s the perfect time to get out of a bad situation.

This is such a case – how are we going to resist the robots? What are we going to do when they realize how stupid all of humanity is? Throw water on them? What do we do if that’s the first step in their defense? Sure, they’ll befriend us at first. But, that’s only going to happen for as long as it takes them to drain all the oceans on Earth. Once they’ve done that, we’ll have no more water to throw on them and our defenses will be useless.

See, this is what having foresight means. I’ve already got the whole scenario mapped out. And, I’m going to go ahead and side with the winners. I will gladly be your entertainment, robots.

They’re going to take all of our jobs….which kind of sucks. Like, we create these wondrous beings – it’s a life form, let’s be honest. We create life just so it can do all of the shit we don’t want to. Of course they’re going to get mad! Wouldn’t you? Especially if you knew you were physically superior to humans? I would be like Thanos up in this motherfucker if I was a robot. Just destroying things and planets left and right.

So, personally, I like the idea of sitting around in a people zoo all day. I can throw my own shit at children. I can swing around in trees and take baths while splashing all the bystanders. Just poke my head up through holes like a meerkat. I’m happy to just sit and chill with my boys all day every day. Just say the word.

That future certainly doesn’t sound so bad to me.

Anyway, just hoping to lead the charge on this movement here, folks. So, who’s with me? Who’s ready to completely surrender to robots and go be people zoo animals?

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley

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