Welcome all degenerate gamblers back into my weekly American football column, Tank the 401k. Here, I will divulge all my professional eagle-eyed opinions on the upcoming week. Call your bookie and empty those retirement accounts!
Hell of a bounce back week for YABOI, as I went 4-1. My only loss came at the hands of the beautiful Mike Leach and those disappointing Washington State Cougars. I was on y’all all. damn. season. We won some bets together, but when I needed y’all most, you let me down. I thought for sure that +10 against Washington was easy money, but I was wrong. And, I was clearly wrong about the Cougs being the best team in the Pac-12. Just holding myself accountable.
That said, elsewhere in the column, I was money! I’m like the Chad Pennington (two-time NFL Comeback Player of the Year) of American football gambling columnists. Except I don’t have a robot arm, and I didn’t attend college in the mountains of West Virginia. Oh well – onto the picks!
BIG NATURAL’S TANK THE 401K PICKS
NCAAF: Ohio State -6 vs. Wisconsin – I do like the Buckeyes big against the unproven Badgers. I’m kind of surprised this line is as low as it is, and that makes me a little hesitant. Those boys in Vegas know what they’re doing after all. But, ultimately, I just like Urban Meyer, J.T. Barrett, and the Buckeyes big in this spot.
NCAAF: Georgia +2.5 vs. Auburn – Kerryon Johnson is probable, but I still like the Bulldogs in this matchup. It’s awfully hard to beat a team twice in one season, much less on the championship stage. Georgia is going to be out for blood, and Jake Fromm is going to light up the Auburn secondary.
NCAAF: Memphis +7 vs. UCF – I know this may seem foolish, but the Tigers are lighting up the scoreboard right now. They had an effective tune-up for this game against East Carolina last week, so I think they’re ready to take down UCF, who will be exhausted after that fireworks display against South Florida on Black Friday. I like Memphis to hang around.
NFL: Indianapolis +9.5 @ Jacksonville – this may look like a mismatch, but the Colts are hanging around with teams, and unless the defense really gets going, I don’t think the Jags are built to really blow teams out. The Colts could win this game outright, so 9.5 points is HUGE.
NFL: Pittsburgh -5.5 @ Cincinnati – I like the Bengals as a wild card team, and that defense is underrated. But, I just don’t see them in the same class as the Steelers right now. They struggled with a Packers team that was desperate. I don’t think the Bengals match that. Steelers win this one by at least a touchdown.
Last Week: (4-1)
On the Season: (40-30-1) – 57%
Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. He is a strong supporter of Team GSD and #BeBetter. “Big Natural” covers the Tennessee Titans, Alabama Crimson Tide football, the WWE, and a whole wealth of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley
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