I Can Safely Admit That I Don’t Have the Balls to Send It Off the Side of a Towering Waterfall

 In Humor

I like to think of myself as a pretty ballsy guy. I’ve been known to jump off a few ladders in my day. You won’t find me complaining about overcooked steak. And, I have gone too long without applying deodorant. What I’m trying to say is that I consider myself a veritable badass, and I like to live dangerously.

But, even a hardass John Wayne type like myself has limits, and today, folks….I think I found mine…

Send it ♻️ @get.sendy @shiloh_shahan

A post shared by Morons (@moronsdoingthings) on

Yeah, no….

Yeah, no I’m good. Haven’t you guys ever seen Club Dread? Don’t you know what happens if you jump like that and don’t have a tight enough butthole? Yeah….the water rushes right up through your body and out your mouth. It’s science.

So, really, this is more or less me being cautious and not scared. Which….there’s a difference. When you’re cautious, it’s just seen as being a caring person. You have a lot to live for – your family, your job, Hardee’s…whatever…people see that and they’re like, “damn look at ol’ Stones being responsible!”

But, when you’re scared, you’re just a piss-pants wittle baby. That ain’t me. So, now that we’ve hashed all of this out, I think we’re at a good place, and I can safely say that I am still not a bitch. Regardless, one thing that can be said with 10000000% certainty is that this bro is anything but a piss-pants wittle baby.

Stoney Keeley is the Editor in Chief of The SoBros Network. A strong advocate of GSD (get shit done) and #BeBetter, he’s down to talk Tennessee Titans and Alabama Crimson Tide football over a beer any day. Check him out covering the WWE for WrestlingNews.co. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley@WrestlingNewsCo

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